This site is dedicated to those who are hurting, live(d/s) in an abusive environment, and/or are lost. You are in the right place if you are looking for healing, to be loved unconditionally, to respond to others with love, and to get to know God better.
I’ve always been honest about my relationship with God and how I became a believer and follower of Christ. I am not looking to persuade anyone to change, that is not my job. What I want to do is share my story of how I rose up from an abusive environment to love myself and find myself worthy of all that is good and deserving of more than just a fairytale love. I am sharing with you the life I lived, the life I want to live and what I am doing to become the person I envisioned myself. I am not perfect, I do not have all the answers on how to better my life, but I am passionate about getting there.
I have parents that are not the best of people when they are together. I lived in an abusive and manipulative environment and for the longest time thought that abuse was normal in any household; although I was constantly told to hide it from everyone. I grew up in a house that had little love and shows almost no affection.
I grew up thinking I did not deserve anyone’s love because my parents did not love me. I grew up wanting a happily ever after but horrible arguments and fights in the house would quickly remind me how ignorant and naive I was to even dream that. I wanted to run away but had no means. I thought I would never escape from this life.
I found peace, love, and self-worth when I got to know God. I found a way out, more than just one. I found my first love, Jesus, my second love, my baby sister, and my-until-the-end-of-my-life love, my fiancé Max.
I believe that love heals all. Why? As humans, we crave that connection with others and we desire some amount of attention. When I’m in a bad mood and a stranger’s smiles at me or says something nice to me, it warms my heart because it means they cared. They cared enough to be kind to me, to make that connection with me – that to me is neighborly love. That’s great, but I know that sometimes we are so wrapped up in our own misery, it’s hard to see who else is suffering. That is why I believe the biggest and most important love we should focus on is loving ourselves because we can only love others if we love ourselves first. (Number one thing to remember, hurt people hurt people. I’ve seen this so many times in relationships and also in myself and how I respond when I am hurt).
When we are hurt, we can only respond in the same way, right? If someone steps on your foot, you’re most likely to feel the pain and push that person away. In the same way, if someone says something to hurt you, you’re likely to say something that will hurt them. And the cycle continues. But if you heal and learn to love yourself honestly, you will be protected by love and will not respond in pain, but with love. And it could change that person. Even if it doesn’t, the cycle of hurt will not be continued by you.
The first post I wrote is about how to love yourself and how you can visually see love. I cherish this post because when I apply it to myself, my life, I become a person I love. Check it out here and I hope it changes your life. Don’t forget to subscribe to receive notices of my upcoming blog posts!